I don't know how many times I've tried to tell you off...be mean  and say all the bad thoughts that cross my mind when I am hurting really bad...I did again today in my other blog...we'll see if I can leave it there for you to maybe read one day...or will I chicken out once again and delete the words...the words I know will make you mad...make you hate me...the one thing I never wanted to do to you was hurt you...certainly not like you have hurt me... they say to treat others as you'd like to be treated...does that mean to always be nice...always be forgiving...even when the other person is mean and cruel? You will never know how very much you hurt me...never know how close I was to the end..how I can't trust another anymore...can't let myself really love again like I did you...

and that is my fate...destined to always love someone who could care less...who took my love...my heart and shredded it to bits...